2003-01-27 - 2:54 p.m.
I had my Annual this morning, and I asked them to check my thyroid and my hematocrit count because I've been feeling quite tired lately. My vote is for thyroid. When I said that to Sonny, he was appalled. What? Am I horrible for having a secret desire that they'll look at my results and give me a magic pill that makes me effortlessly drop ten pounds and still enjoy my French toast and bacon? In my fantasy, this pill exists. Anyway, in this fantasy, my doctor tells me I'm really a very skinny woman who has been unjustly encased in 15 extra pounds due to no fault of her own. Then, I get my pill. Sonny thinks this is wrong on several levels. Whatever. He didn't pack any on when he became a dad.
So, I find out the results tomorrow, but here is what happened at my appointment this morning. I signed in and wrote my doctor's name in the blank next to my name on the sign-in sheet. I noticed that everyone who was seeing Dr. Flores (my doctor--a woman) had written "Flores" in the blank, and everyone who was seeing the male doctor, Dr. Kay, had written "Dr. Kay" in the blank. Everyone. Whoa. Maybe they were just following the lead of the person above them, but the two doctor's patients were mixed all together on the same sheet of paper so that doesn't really fly. I asked the receptionist if that happened a lot and she said "all the time." She said she was always getting calls for appointments with "Ms. Flores." She said she always corrects them, but nobody ever calls for "Mr. Kay." Very interesting horse shit.
At the end of my appointment, the nurse came in to draw my blood for the tests, and I PASSED OUT. Yes, I did. Luckily, I was already laying down. But, talk about a horrible experience. I felt like this. 
Only slightly less chubby and slightly more weepy. (I stole this picture from my friend, Andy, who, I believe, stole it from somethingawful.com. Beautiful picture.) I'll have you know I didn't actually cry or anything, but on the inside I was all broken up. It was like all the blood drained out of my head and I broke out in a horrible sweat. I actually thought I was playing it cool and doing a good job of disguising it...just closing my eyes for a moment, relaxing....before I sit up to leave. Only, the next thing I know, there's a wet towel on my forehead and the nurse and another nurse are asking me if I'm okay. Weird. I don' know if it was psychological since I am a bit of a wimp and I did look when the nurse was worried about some blood getting on my shirt. Or, if it was physical...in which case, I'm curious to get the results from my hematocrit count. But, I will mark it down under very unpleasant experiences. I do NOT recommend passing out.
